'— Don’t shout at me! I’ve had a bad day!
   I take it down a notch, cause I need to inspect that ass.
—Okey, Lena, I’m sorry, I soften. — Now let me see this wound . . . and I soon have her lying on the couch, me hunkered over her, her pants around her ankles and her panties still on, but pilled up into her ass cleft to exposure those large, white, goosebumped buttocks. Sorenson must be the whitest chick in southern Florida. I gone branded me that bitch’ fat, lilywhite ass! — That is a sore one, I tell her as I dab the wound with antiseptic. It’s already yellowing and smudging blue-black around the shot’s red tear. — Invasive species . . . I’d put money on it.
   Fuck, yeah, I could spread those wobbly globes till I see the pubic hair from her pussy curl around those panties and . . . no, keep it professional. — I’m just gonna clean this up . . .  I hear my voice low and throaty.
    — Hmmm . . . Sorenson numbles into the cushion.
   After cleaning the injury and administering a Band-Aid, I get up. — All done.'
  'So I’m undoing the knotted cord on Lucy’s sweat pants, then tugging them over her hips, letting them side down her thighs to her ankles. She’s breathing heavily as I fall down onto my knees, getting between her legs. She doesn’t ask to be uncuffed, as I slip her panties down and spread her outer lips, entranced by those soft, brown pubic curls, resplendent above her clit, glistening with her juices and sweat. I pull on her hips, guiding her to a recumbent position on the floor. Then I move onto her, darting my tongue into her soaking cunt to her clit. Lucy’s body involuntarily jerks and a moan explodes from her. I can’t believe how wet she is as my finger glides inside her and I start to softly lick the hard knot of her clitoris. I slide my finger in and out of her, increasing the velocity of both clit-licking and finger-fucking until she emits a sound like a long squeak. I feel her hand resting on top of mt head, gently but firmly securing me to my task. Her cunt tastes so sweet, and I really want to tease that hateful bitch, to make her beg, but that option is unavailable as her grip tightens on my hair and she comes in the spasms of a heaving epilepsy victim, spraying my face with her juices.'

Irvine Welsh, The Sex Lives of Siamese Twins, publisher: Jonathan Cape

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